Hamster off her Wheel

Have you ever had your entire week just “thrown off” by one unexpected little twist or turn? That was my week, for sure and certain. I (obviously) did not plan in my September “surgery for Klynt” and even though he is recovering really well and being such a trooper, I have been completely behind ever since Monday. I went to bed exhausted every night, I lost my phone twice in one day, I sent emails without their necessary attachments. I even ended up grocery shopping at 9pm last night (which ended at 11:30 with the last item being put away), because I rearranged my work week to allow for being with my Klynters during his surgery, which meant rearranging all my normal wife and mom jobs too. Whew! I am delighted to be sitting in my jammies at 9:48am with a big ol’ day of “whatever I want to do” spread out in front of me!

One benefit to being a little “off kilter” all week is it shakes me up a bit and exposes a few cracks in the surface of my faith. For one thing, I notice I am way more easily agitated when I am out of my normal routine. That comfort of the familiar and regular is taken away and I feel a bit raw. I found myself needing to apologize for a harsh tone with Emma or making an assumption with Kyler. It’s humbling to see how easily my “goodness” erodes under a little pressure. I take so much comfort though, in knowing God does not crumble. He remains my one source of constant in an ever-changing life. I think part of my challenge is to learn to find more comfort in Him, and less in routine and schedule.

Another blessing of this week was questioning my norms. There are little ruts I dig that I never even think to alter, until they get altered and I realize it was better! Working out on Wednesdays around 8:30 worked great this week. Not doing laundry Tues-Thurs was not, in fact, a disaster. I’m still basically caught up. It was kind of nice being in my office on Friday and getting to visit with my Branches girls without the busyness of so many clients.

As thankful as I am for today’s wonderful laid back pace, I am also choosing to be thankful for a week that felt hectic and weird and uncomfortable. God has been teaching me to choose gratitude over complaint for several years now, and when I pick gratitude it’s amazing how much goodness and joy I find in things that used to bring me such angst. 

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